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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Miss HowardTV of the Year for 2008

Howard welcomed Brenda Acevedo, Miss HowardTV of the Year for 2008, to the studio and congratulated her on the new title. Brenda nervously stuttered a response, and Howard thanked her for the ego boost: "In high school I would've cut my nuts off for you." Brenda showed the crew the diamond necklace she won as part of the prize, and Artie complimented where it fell: "It hangs right in the middle of your big, pendulous breasts." Brenda asked Robin how she felt about her breast-reduction surgery, so Robin told her to be careful: "I've seen some breast-reduction jobs that are just heinous." Brenda said she was still considering it: "When you come out and you're all natural, some things just aren't where you expect them to be." Brenda also said she was huge Artie fan - but had a serious boyfriend, a professional poker player.Despite this cockblock, Brenda asked if Artie would like to feel her breasts (with her boyfriend’s permission of course). Never being one to look a gift horse in the mouth, Artie jumped up and gave them a squeeze. Brenda was thrilled: "It's Artie! I don't think I'll realize it until I watch it back and think, 'What the hell did I do?'" Howard asked if Artie used the right amount of pressure, but she wanted more: "He was too soft." CHRISTIE KANE MASTURBATES A LOT Howard then welcomed Christie Kane, Miss HowardTV for April, who spoke with a strange affect. Howard asked if she was hard of hearing, but she denied it: "No, I'm just from Brooklyn." Howard then ran Christie through her sexual history, including the time she and a friend took turns tying each other up and performing oral sex. Christie laughed that she even hooked up with a drunken Hasidic man at a recent party: "I'm just a very sexual person." Christie claimed she masturbates ten times a day and was once caught mid-diddle in a tanning booth. Emboldened, Howard wondered if the crew could take a look at her boobs, so she whipped 'em out. Robin asked if it was a good view, and Howard answered quickly: "Yes, it's good! They're two boobs!" Christie then jumped on the Sybian and went for a ride: "It vibrates a lot." After a scream-heavy ride, Christie had trouble standing: "That was so f’ing hot...I wanna take it home."
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