New Jersey Shore - Mike 'The Situation' Sorrentino ( MTV ) visits Howard Stern

DON'T TOUCH THE SITUATION'S HAIR




Mike 'The Situation' Sorrentino stopped by to promote his new book, 'Here's the Situation,' and immediately complained that Gary had messed up his hair while putting on his headphones: "Gary had no regard...he didn't even care! There is a correct way to put on the headphones and he mushed me pretty much." (That was mushed, not smooshed.)

DESTINED TO BE THE SITUATION

Howard asked about Mike's pre-MTV life, so Mike explained that he'd started working out at 16 ("For chicks.") and was employed as a mortgage broker before landing his 'Jersey Shore' gig: "Until the market crashed and I had no job." After losing his job, Mike moved back in with his parents: "No money. Down on my luck. Unemployment. The whole 9." He turned to Jersey Shore (Group, GTL) TV Poster Print - 24x36modeling to make ends meet--and was 'discovered' soon after: "I did underwear modeling for 2 weeks and got noticed for TV."

Howard asked Mike how he dealt with gays in the modeling world, so Mike shrugged that it was weird when they'd ask to 'adjust' him in his underwear--so he'd just brush them off and handle things on his own: "It doesn't bother me one bit. I got mass appeal, I guess." Mike said he'd been comforted by a sense of destiny: "There was a voice in my head that said something was out there."

PROTEIN VODKA?!

While he was in studio, Mike repeatedly worked in plugs for his vodka company, Devotion, which sells "the first protein-infused vodka on the planet." Robin didn't understand the point: "Why would you infuse protein into vodka?" The Situation just laughed: "Why wouldn't you?"

IT'S HARD OUT THERE FOR A PIMP

Mike told the crew his newfound fame was making it hard to find a good girl: "You're target almost sometimes 'cause, you know, you're doing very well for yourself...it's getting hard for me to find a real relationship." Mike said he'd like to be in a committed relationship ("To share all these experiences I'm having.") but he only meets fame-hungry girls these days: "A good indicator is when she starts to brag about all the other famous people she's met.” Mike said it had gotten to the point that he had to have 24x7 security and he has them hold onto the cellphones of the girls he does hook-up with just make sure no photos get taken.

JD DOES NOT WANT TO BE SITUATED


Here's the Situation: A Guide to Creeping on Chicks, Avoiding Grenades, and Getting in Your GTL on theJersey Shore
Howard introduced Mike to JD, a staffer with a nickname of his own: "Did you ever hear of a guy on the Internet called Da Badass?" JD said he was irritated by Mike, as he was famous for dubious reasons: "I'm sorry I didn't think to trademark DTF." Mike offered JD some advice: "I think he should just be positive and have a positive outlook...when you are hating on people, you forget about your own goals."



Mike said he'd like to help JD turn around his look: "I would like to Situate you." JD dismissed the idea: "I don't want to be Situated. Let me be bitter and angry." Mike said he was serious ("I can actually turn him into a pimp.") but Howard doubted his ability to turn JD around, saying he spoke from experience: "I thought I could too but it's impossible." Asked for a summarized plan, Mike said he'd take JD and "shave him down, tan him up...he's gotta get different clothes, some jewelry.